BREAKING NEWS: LOCAL FRESHMAN FINDS CHRIST THOUGH CHRISTIAN T-SHIRT.

Winona Lake, IN - In what can only be described as a miracle from God, Jacob Walker, 18, found Christ this summer through the help of a Christian t-shirt.

Says Walker of his conversion, “I don’t really know how to explain it, ya know? One day I was out huntin’ with my paw, and I saw this beaut. A real beaut. A ten pointer, just grazin’ in a clearing. I raised my gun up to take it down, but for some reason I just couldn’t pull the trigger. It was like there was a gun lock on my pointer finger. So I tried my middle finger, and that one didn’t work either. I kept on trying all my fingers, including the ones on my left hand, but none of ‘em worked. It was the weirdest thing ever I think. I could move ‘em fine when they weren’t on the gun, but once they was on the trigger, I couldn’t move ‘em. My paw said he, ‘Hain’t nevar seen ‘nethang like it.’

“When we went home that night, I looked on the internet for a t-shirt to commemorate me nearly shootin’ that ten pointer. I found a shirt with a deer on the front, and so I ordered it. When it came in the mail, I realized that there was other words on it.”

The other words on the shirt were from the Bible. Walker’s father had this to say about the situation. “Yeh, me’n the boy, we was out huntin’, but he couldn’ kill ‘nethang. I guess he ordered himself a shirt off the internets, but it had some words on it. I can’t read very well, so I don’ know what they said, but he took of for the libary. He said he had to find a Bible to look up somthin. When he come back, he said he was a Christian now.”

Walker, a resident of Beta 3 South, said that it was when he was in the library, he found who Jesus was. “It was at that point I decided that I would go to a Christian college. So I applied to Grace, and got in.”

Walker was beside himself when he first walked into TOL to get his books and found that they sold Christian shirts there. “He shouted, ‘YEE-HA!!!’ at the top of his lungs,” said Walker’s friend Jesse Hendrix, also a freshman at Grace. “It was a really weird situation. I mean after that, everyone looked at us, but Jake didn’t care. He said that he was, ‘gonna spend all my flex dollars on them t-shirts.’”

Walker hopes to start a club that will make special Grace College themed shirts. He says the club will be called the, “Grace College Christian T-Shirt Club For Christians Who Love To Be Creative And Show Their Creativity Through Cool T-Shirts,” or G.C.C.T.S.C.F.C.W.L.T.B.S.A.S.T.C.T.C.T.S. for short.