WINONA LAKE: The Grace College Lancers will be taking to Miller field with a little more style this year. Coach Hotchkin and his squad seek to step on the pitch with style and elegance this season. According to Hotchkin, this starts before the kickoff, "Soccer is an extremely mental game. You have to be able to out-think your opponent if you want to win. Because of this mental aspect, we are looking at ways to raise the self-esteem of our team.”
The coach believes the best way to raise the team’s self-esteem is by looking good. Along with his knowledge of the game, Hotchkin introduced the lancers to the 3/4 pants, more commonly known as ‘man-pris’. "Man-pris are completely underrated in soccer. Not only are they comfortable and practical, they are stylish and trendy; that is the really important aspect of the game,” said the coach. Since the introduction of man-pris many other grace athletic teams have taken notice. Head baseball coach Josh Bailey had this to say, "We are seriously considering replacing our yearly preseason trip to Florida, with a preseason spa trip. The better our cuticles, the better our batting!"
This year the men's soccer team is looking to accessorize with matching man-purses, or ‘murses’, if you will. "As a team we firmly believe that if we a going to take over the MCC, then we need the right equipment. These ‘murses’ will, of course, be practical. They will hold cleats, tape, pre-wrap, Tide to-go pens, and hair gel. Some people may argue that the lancers are simply adding the word ‘man’ to common female items, in belief that it will make it permissible. In response to the doubters, Hotchkin says; “We know there’s more to life than being really, really ridiculously good looking; we just haven’t found out what that is yet. Besides, we didn’t add the ‘man’ to manicure...it was already like that.”
The coach believes the best way to raise the team’s self-esteem is by looking good. Along with his knowledge of the game, Hotchkin introduced the lancers to the 3/4 pants, more commonly known as ‘man-pris’. "Man-pris are completely underrated in soccer. Not only are they comfortable and practical, they are stylish and trendy; that is the really important aspect of the game,” said the coach. Since the introduction of man-pris many other grace athletic teams have taken notice. Head baseball coach Josh Bailey had this to say, "We are seriously considering replacing our yearly preseason trip to Florida, with a preseason spa trip. The better our cuticles, the better our batting!"
This year the men's soccer team is looking to accessorize with matching man-purses, or ‘murses’, if you will. "As a team we firmly believe that if we a going to take over the MCC, then we need the right equipment. These ‘murses’ will, of course, be practical. They will hold cleats, tape, pre-wrap, Tide to-go pens, and hair gel. Some people may argue that the lancers are simply adding the word ‘man’ to common female items, in belief that it will make it permissible. In response to the doubters, Hotchkin says; “We know there’s more to life than being really, really ridiculously good looking; we just haven’t found out what that is yet. Besides, we didn’t add the ‘man’ to manicure...it was already like that.”
this is hilarious and i like it. just a heads up, though, if you continue to post it on the sounding board's page i have heard your blog will be shut down. fyi: be funny, but don't intrude on student organizations.
ReplyDeleteHey, don't listen to this buffoon. Keep posting it on the Sounding Board's page! We live in Free Country, USA. That means freedom of speech and freedom of posting links of Facebook pages. It also means freedom of laying under cars and crawling on your hands and knees, but that's another story... Hey, maybe you guys could do a story about that!
ReplyDeleteKeep it up, its amazing to have someone stand up for us for once! instead of all the lies GC spreads.
ReplyDelete